Your Weekly Rundown: "Living Lohan"

Jesus Christ! Living Lohan is some boring shit. I almost couldn't bear to watch it.

The large majority of this week's episode consisted of Ali and Dina griping about how those wily tabloid reporters twist their words. Uh, guys, your words aren't distorted, you just say stupid shit. [Case in point]

The best part of the show was when Grandma put on the Hellraiser mask.

Later, Ali smells something funky in the house and calls the fire department. The operator asks for a last name, hears Lohan [sirens sound promptly]. The whole fire department shows up. Too bad Dina can't be bothered. She's out getting her drank on at some party for a lame magazine.

That's all folks. If this show doesn't get any better, this might be the last Living Lohan post.

Sorry I couldn't even find footage.

What'd You Think?

The Lohan's (Living Lohan) and Denise Richards's (It's Complicated) reality shows debuted tonight on E!.

And all I have to say is 'meh.'

Dina, 45, and Ali, 14, said they're taking their lives to the small screen to "defuse rumors" and prove they're "normal." But by "normal," they meant stupid and boring. (Actually I guess that's a pretty accurate description for the vast population). The first five minutes of Living Lohan consist of Dina flipping through the daily rags, in search of something to bitch about. Then Ali complains about the song selection for her upcoming album; still ends up singing something crappy.

Things over at It's Complicated weren't much better. Richards plans to throw a BBQ, but oops, there's nothing to cook on. Thank goodness for BBQ Galore and its $5,000 grills.

The best part of show is when Richards, 37, catches her pet pigs going at it.



Consequently, is that true?!?! Do boy pigs have corkscrew-shaped penises?

Oh yeah, and then there was the part where her little dog eats pig shit off the rug.




Thoughts on the shows or any of this?

The Lohans Get All Bitchy on "Showbiz Tonight"

Ali and Dina Lohan are riding a media whirlwind to promote their new E! reality show--Living Lohan. And they're not being particularly nice in the process.

They went on Showbiz Tonight last night and bristled at every question. (Snippy interviews always make me feel uncomfortable. Think Angelina Jolie. I've heard Tori Amos's no fun either.)

When reporter AJ Hammer asked how Dina was going to prevent Ali from going down the same wayward road as Lindsay (a legitimate question), she responded "Lindsay is on a fine path. But, um, you're believing what you read, which is kind of sad." When he pointed out that the older Lohan had done a stint in rehab; and had been arrested..twice. She used the trite excuse "nobody's perfect." And said "Ali will find her own path."



Poor Ali. She's a doomed, coached little imp.

Question I would have liked to ask: Hey Dina, do you have a nose to go with those nostrils?