Ashlee Simpson Wentz took to her Myspace blog on Sunday.
Here's what she had to say:
"The Dog Ate My Tour
Dear friends, fans, lurkers, stalkers and shittalkers! I'm really sorry to announce that I'm going to postpone my tour this summer. My team gave me a few reasons I could use: 1. jury duty (but you can get out of jury duty once) 2. creative differences (but I'm a solo artist so that didn't make sense) 3. not in the mood/have a headache (wait, that was an excuse for Pete! and it didn't work. See next reason) 4. the baby ...and that's where I drew the line. The truth is I want to put on an amazing show for you the next time I come to your town. I promise I will be back, better than ever and ready to rock out. Until then, Love, Ashlee"
Form your own opinions. But note the part about her plans to put on "an amazing show."
More Context: I guess she's been getting flak from The P, and the like, for canceling some of her summer tour dates or something.
A Jessica Simpson, 27, country single hit the Interweb yesterday! Hooray! Too bad it's sucky and generic.
It's called "Come on Over," and it's the first song off her upcoming country album, which is slated for a September release.
Hear the track yourself.
[I'm on it, looking for another video.]
Sorry guys this is the best I could come up with. There's a snippet of the song in the clip below.
More good news! Simpson may be coming to a fair or festival near you this summer. So keep a look out!
I admit I feel a little bad for picking on her because she clearly has some sort of identity issue (my opinion: see Glamour interview). But she is trying to hawk us loads of crap.
Here's my message to Simpson: Get it together. Figure things out. Then come back and put something out that's of better quality.
Cause if you continue to try sell me shoes like this
for $90 (!!), or release songs like the one heard above, I'm going to continue to make fun of you.
Trust me these pumps look A LOT more hideous in person. I peeped em' when I hit up Nordstrom's half-yearly sale.
I will admit I have seen a decent Jessica Simpson brand shoe or two; but most are staggeringly ugly.
Ambre Lake, 38-ish, the winner of Rock of Love 2, is in some weird Choose Your Own Adventure-type online slasher movie called (appropriately enough) "Project: Slasher." Here's the link. The good part is you decide if she lives or dies. I say she should die. Then there can be a Rock of Love 3. And there needs to be a Rock of Love 3.
I watched part of the movie. It's actually kind of cool...if you're bored. I like it.
Image via People. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Singer/Songwriter Ne-Yo, 28, was surprisingly impressed by Lindsay Lohan's singing ability. He and Lohan, 21, collaborated on a track together called "Bossy." And Ne-Yo was supposedly so ecstatic about the way it turned out, he called Lohan to apologize for having doubts about her. [Billboard]
And there you have it: non-mean news about Lindsay Lohan. That was hard.
I was this close to posting the pic of Lohan in a gold bikini at Jeremy Piven's b-day party--circa 2006-- as the accompanying photo. But I recognize that wouldn't have been nice. Instead I'll just provide the link. What? It's for old times sake.
Also surprising, Ne-Yo is part Chinese. My peeps. Alright so I'm only a quarter; and look like a cracker. [Wiki Wiki]
Ne-Yo image via Go Where Hip Hop. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oooh. I just saw this group picture of the girls at the NYC Sex and the City premiere.
Nice!
The hoopla surrounding this film is ridiculous/on the verge of disgusting. But I still ♥ them.
Image via Us. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The drunk driver who hit Sandra Bullock's car in Massachusetts last month gets one-year probation. Lucille Gatchell, 64, pleaded guilty on Tuesday to operating [a vehicle] under the influence of alcohol and a marked lanes violation. [The Boston Globe]
See my previous posting for more details. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Those AshleeSimpsonWentzWet Seal clothes I told you about, apparently aren't selling as well as I expected.
Newlywed Ashlee Simpson, 23, is changing her name to Ashlee Wentz. "I think that that's something that a woman should do when they're marrying a man," she tells People.
Antiquity rears its ugly head. But I guess that's what shotgun weddings are for*?
J/k do what you feel like doing peeps.
* I should clarify that I don't know whether SimpsonWentz is actually pregnant. But she totally is...probably.
The Hamptons gone wild. This is what happens when you try to deprive rich people of they alcohol...at a wine gallery where booze is hawked without a license. [Gawker]
Wealthy grown-folks should try a little harder to ackright. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kirsten Dunst says she went to rehab for depression, not drug or alcohol dependency. Dunst, 26, spent six months at Cirque Lodge--a treatment center in Utah-- last year. [E! News] Que no interesante.
That still doesn't explain wearing outfits like this.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Jolie-Pitts bought a $70 million chateau on the French Riveria. HOT DAMN!! Thasa alotta money. Technically they signed a three-year lease. But I won't let that get in the way of my awe. The place comes loaded with a vineyard, olive groves, a lake, a moat, 20 fountains, a forest to help ensure privacy and, count em', 35 BEDROOMS!! [LA Times]
Uh can I stay with you guys? I swear you won't even know I'm there. Really.
Images via People and the LA Times. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tori Spelling, 35, will reprise her role as Donna Martin for the new 90210 spinoff. A rep for the show says, "[Donna will] own one of the coolest [clothing] stores in Beverly Hills.” [People] Frankly I'm not understanding all the hype surrounding this show. Yeah I liked the original, but it ended for a reason. People wised-up and stopped watching. Let's count our losses and be done with it. (Two clichés for the price of one)
Pictured: Spelling and her much cuter better half pug, Mimi La Rue. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Weezer's music video for "Pork and Beans" is the number one viral video on the Interweb, according toPeople. "By the end of Memorial Day weekend, the clip had more than 3 million hits on YouTube."
That doesn't mean I have to like it or think it's funny, right?
For some reason blogger is not letting me edit my previous "Today Around the Blogoshpere" posting, so here's more. Ali Lohan, 14, is the oldest looking 8th grader I've ever seen! The teen fugged-up Letterman last night to talk about her upcoming E! reality show Living Lohan.
Meh, not really worth watching. It's kinda cute when she talks about her micro-mini Maltese. And by kinda I mean not really. I still want one though.
"Legendary music mogul Lou Pearlman, who created the boy bands Backstreet Boys and 'N Sync, was sentenced on Wednesday to 25 years in prison for stealing more than $300 million from investors." [People]
Call me crazy, but something tells me tubby isn't going to fare well in the slammer.
Good news though, "Federal Judge G. Kendall Sharp, of Orlando, Fla., said he would reduce the jail time by one month for every $1 million Pearlman, 53, returned to the investors."
You might want to consider forking over the dough...assuming you have any left, Old Man Moneybags. You've got "jail bait" (something you're familiar with) written all over you.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In the new issue of US Weekly, singer Christina Aguilera, 27, divulges that since giving birth, her bra-size has ballooned to an E-cup. Dayum! [US].
"It's kind of hilarious," she says of her overinflated fun bags. "Funny, in a circus-freak kind of way," she meant to add.
Allah bless implants. Silicon tainted milk does a baby good?
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Rocker Steven Tyler, 60, has checked into Las Encinas Hospital drug rehabilitation clinic, according to Usmagazine.com. The center is where Dr. Drew Pinsky treated patients for VH1’s Celebrity Rehab." His rep had no comment.[US]
At 60 you'd think he'd be like "Aww fuck it. Give me the drugs. I'm old. I quit quitting."
But good for him. I guess? I don't know. A party's not a party until the uppers, downers and hallucinogenic drugs have arrived. It's the only real way to have a good time.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Katie Holmes, 29, is bound for a Broadway debut. The actress will costar with John Lithgow, 62, Dianne Wiest, 60, and Patrick Wilson, 34, in the revival of Arthur Miller's All My Sons. She will play Wilson's fiancée in the WWII-era drama about a businessman (Lithgow) whose factory sold faulty parts to the U.S. Military during World War II, resulting in the deaths of 21 pilots. [US]
Apparently this is a good thing because Suri, Holmes's 2-year-old daughter with Tom Cruise, loves Broadway. Riiight.
This is the face Simon Cowell, 48, made during Fantasia Barrino's performance on tonight's Idol elimination episode. It sums up my thoughts quite nicely.
Does that even qualify as singing? Was she speaking English?! And who was that guy who appeared out of nowhere--like a ninja-- and started singing from the balcony? I'm so not buying her stamps now.
Lastly, Syesha Mercado, 21, was eliminated tonight. I guess it was her time to go. But I was still sad. :'(
Image via Oh No They Didn't (I don't know what I would do without it).
Here are some of the looks from Ashlee Simpson's Wet Seal clothing line, which hit stores April 22, coinciding with the release of her third album Bittersweet World.
It's pretty much what I expected--I think. To be honest, I was moderately flummoxed and a lot appalled after the launch of Heidi Montag's Heidiwood, sold in Anchor Blue stores. I don't have words to describe its shiteousness (New York Magazine does). So after that disaster, I was kind of worried for Simpson (not really).
And with semi-good reason. But while her line isn't fashion foward or chic (did you really expect it to be? At Wet Seal!?), I will say it's a whole lot less trampy than Montag's. And itis wearable among the younger set. Actually I don't know that. Younger set, I'm talking nine-to-12-year-olds, you tell me.
Her t-shirts--with her likeness silkscreened and plastered across the front--range from $15.50-to-$19.50. And you can buy a complete look for about a hundred bucks--tacky plastic pumps and flimsy accessories included.
The Shins will perform an original song for the Nick Jr. show Yo Gabba Gabba!, airing Friday May 23 at 11 a.m.
According to The Earth Times, "In the episode, titled 'Imagine,' The Shins perform 'It's OK, Try Again,' and the Gabba gang discovers how to use their imaginations, cheer up a friend and learn about the different muscles in the body."
That's bound to be educational; not to mention stoney.
It has to be, considering one of the show's creators, Christian Jacobs, goes by the alias "MC Bat Commander."
Here's the show's Wiki overview: "Yo Gabba Gabba! is hosted by a character named DJ Lance Rock, and five toy monsters: Brobee, Foofa, Muno, Plex, and Toodee. It features The MC Bat Commander and Ricky Fitness, two members of The Aquabats, and Adam Deibert (formerly of the Aquabats) as the voice of Muno the Cyclops.
The absurd style of humor used in the show is intended, like The Aquabats, to appeal to adults through its manic, frenzied approach to wholesome messages, while at the same time carrying all the content of the average Nick Jr. program for the whole family."
I don't know what it does for you, but that description makes me want to tune in.
And if you haven't already, check out the Yo Gabba Gabba! Web site. It's trippy, yet it's something kids would probably find fun.
Ewww! I just read on Perez that Metallica drummer Lars Ulrich hinted at possibly releasing a theoretical future album in a fashion similar to what Radiohead did with In Rainbows. Customers chose the amount they wanted to pay for the album. And they had the option of not paying anything at all.
Ulrich recently told Rolling Stone that he had observed the behavior of both Radiohead and NIN, and said Metallica may be influenced by them in the future.
"The band's traditional record deal with Warner expires when they release their next studio album."
"We're looking at how we can embrace everything," Ulrich said. "We want to be as free players as possible. We've been observing Radiohead and Trent Reznor [of Nine Inch Nails ] and in 27 years or however long it takes for the next record, we'll be looking forward to everything in terms of possibilities with the internet."
Keep in mind these are the same guys who used to be (and possibly still are) staunchly opposed to free peer-to-peer downloading. They went as far as suing Napster in 2000. Their actions resulted in hundreds of thousands of Napster users being banned from the site . And their original lawsuit also included three colleges.
Ewww indeed!
To his credit Ulrich also told Rolling Stone, in regard to the Napster situation, "We've always been fiercely independent and controlling; sometimes to a fault. "
Choatic05 over at my favorite LiveJournal blog says this leaked Fergie song, "Labels & Love," is from the Sex and the City soundtrack. It's catchy and it has the right vibe, i.e. it's talking about shopping and Manolos.
The SATC Director Michael Patrick King recently told Entertainment Weekly that Fergie recorded the movie's opening number. He said, “It’s an entirely new song with lyrics, but it has the Sex and the City theme as the DNA — on steroids.” See if you think his description holds up.
Jennifer Hudson, who will play Carrie Bradshaw's assistant in the film, will be featured on the soundtrack too. Her "ballad" is reportedly called "All Dressed Up In Love." It has no leaks that I know of...yet.
This is the default picture the Danity Kane singer is using on her MySpace page. The photo would be better suited on a DVD cover for a movie called "Clitty Clitty Bang Bang"...or something. Consequently, it brings me back to the porn star question.
Outside the realm of the adult industry, this is not hot.
But then again, neither is the clownish, over-tanned, extraterrestrial on crack look. Is that Tinsley Mortimer next to it!?
[Click to Enlarge]
This isn't a good look either.
Neither is this. Whoa those are big.
Or this.Frightening stuff.
She has the potential to be cute--she even used to be. Get it togetha Auberella.
[Click to Enlarge] Aubrey O'day, of Danity Kane, put her relatively new fake boobs to work Tuesday during a visit to MTV studios.
I don't think wearing a sheer top--without a bra-- was what Puffy P. Diddy Daddy Combs had in mind when he told her to work on her image; and to stop being the problem child of the group.
Check out Mariah Carey's appearance from today's episode of The Oprah Winfey Show.
Carey talks about overtaking Elvis's record, introduces her live-in French trainer/chef and shares a portion of the workout regimen that got her so freaking fit.
Part 1
Because Part 2 was boring, straight to Part 3
I love how the Interweb has made it so we almost don't even need to watch TV to keep up with pop culture. When they're not clogged, the Internets are an amazing little series of tubes.
Leona Lewis will be a guest on the Tyra Banks Show, airing Thursday, April 17. Those are two names I'm sad to see in the same sentence. Lewis rocks. Banks suffers from megalomania and a deadly strain of the crazies.
For all you fellow Lewis fans, she'll also be performing "Bleeding Love" on American Idol Wednesday April 23. Side note: I'm a little wary of Idol since it went all Got God? on me during Idol Gives Back. But I'm giving it another chance. Let's keep em' separate guys.
I'm disappointed by MTV's new American Idol-esque show Rock the Cradle--don't ask me why. It's the new show where the children of rock stars compete in a "singing" competition and subsequently get voted off by viewers. With the exception of maybe Tom Johnston's (Doobie Brothers) daughter, Lara Johnston, and the Twisted Sister lead singer's kid, they all suck...hard.
But one of the show's redeeming qualities is Chloe Lattanzi's-- the daughter of Olivia Newton John-- face. See Lattanzi before and after she inflated and defaced her, uh, face. [Courtesy AwfulPlaticSurgery.com]
Is there a reverse lip surgery? Cause she should totally get that.
As is, she's hard to watch.
To see her sing, check out MTV's Web site. It's pretty painful.
